At first glance, Bombcats appears to be a typical physics-puzzler. You fling your protagonists (cats) around a level to complete your objectives and collect three ‘suns’ while you do it. The real defining point is the bomb part of Bombcats. Essentially, your cat is a bomb (whodda thunk?), with a fuse for a tail, that must get, and explode, within close proximity to Bombkittens (I made that up but I want royalties devs!) that have been mysteriously imprisoned in blue cages. As a premise it’s neither extremely original nor a clone of other games. More a conglomerate of several mechanics and genres wrapped up in one well presented package.

It all starts simply enough, with a few environmental obstacles getting in the way. Before long though, you have utilise each cats’ unique ability (such as extra explosions or gripping to walls) and even be clever with kittens you release (they also have a short fuse before a tiny explosion). On top of the increasingly intricate and demanding levels, there are special levels that challenge you to complete five select stages in a certain time limit and some that require you to get your cat as far across a level as possible before you blow up.

Presentation is the kicker card in Bombcats. Right from the menu design, to the music, right over to the smooth controls. Everything feels tight and well designed. It feels like great care has been taken over each detail to ensure it’s not just another crap app in the sea of garbage that is the app market. I have to admit, one of my favourite bits is clearing a level in style and getting rewarded with a chorus of cats congratulating me (how’s that for alliteration Mr Edwards and thanks for my E in GSCE English!).

The only negative I have about Bombcats is the pricing model. Obviously not the initial cost of zero, but that’s my point. The game has so much content to offer and is so good that it would suit being sold for 69p and not bothering with the in app purchases at all. You can complete the game quite easily without spending a penny, but I feel quite strongly that developers (especially ones as small as RadianGames) should get financial recognition for their fine work and I can’t see this game making much on in-app purchases alone. They should trust the game has the ability to stand on its own right as one complete package.

Now I’m off my high-horse, it remains for me to say that I would recommend this game even with a price point of 99p (Ohh Emm Gee) and the fact that is FREE from the get go means there isn’t much reason not to go download it on your iOS device right now! Android users don’t despair, Bombcats is coming your way in the next month or so.

Gameplay

+ Tight controls
+ Tons of content
- Fair but unnecessary ‘freemium’ model

Graphics

+ Right mix of cute and function
+ Smooth framerate

Sound

+ Excellent soundtrack
+ Plenty of cat noises

The Last Starfighter and Wargames have set some pretty high hopes from gamers about a world where games have a hidden agenda, be it positive or negative. As gamers we don’t actually have many urban legends or conspiracy theories, like the programming that provides the entertainment we are binary in nature, something is generally true or a load of hogwash. Every so often though there is something that piques the interest of our digital generation; Slender Man, Herobrine and finally Polybius. Finding out what’s true and false with Polybius is challenging to say the least, this is the story as I originally heard it, and the various theories and rumours that surround it.

In 1981 a game was made, Sinneslöschen Inc produced an arcade machine, a simple tall black box, no art work apart from a marquee along the top that read Polybius. Polybius was a simple arcade game, similar in style to the hit Tempest. According to reports (again rumour and fact are all wavy in this tale) it mixed Tempest gameplay with pseudo Pac-Man game puzzles, there were only a handful of machines built and for some reason Sinneslöschen Inc put these machines in arse crack of no where places like the suburbs of Portland, Oregon and Virginia.

This is where the story goes into the realm of “….The hell?”. Apparently a few kids and adults decided to try their hand at this unknown new machine, they rocked up and slipped in their quarter, swept back their flock of seagulls and commented about the awesomeness of Blondie, Bowie and Roxy Music (My point is that this was the 1980’s). Upon playing the game a select few came down with symptoms of illness including; Nausea, Headaches, Melancholy and, worst case, Suicidal Tendencies. We as level-headed human beings know this is crazy, sure subliminal messages are scientifically proven to work on susceptible victims, but who would want to make this low-level attack against America?

Well apparently the CIA were behind this, Bar and Arcade owners who had the Polybius machine all report seeing ‘Men In Black Coats’ coming to their establishments and taking away information from the Polybius machines. So there you have it, the government in 1980’s America wanted to take out drunks and nerds. The reasons behind this? Well supposedly this could just be a case of the CIA need to test their new subliminal message software out on someone, it could be that this was just bad luck, like the Pokemon episode in the 90’s that caused thousands of kids in Japan to freak out and have epileptic fits. The most obvious answer? Well it’s all just a really good story. This is pure bat poop crazy mental conspiracy theory tin foil hat stuff. Though how much of it is? Some people think that this is all a hoax from some Usenet nerds, much in the same way Slender Man came to be. Others think that this is just a bastardisation of the Tempest arcade machine which made many people ill.

In 2008 a man called Steven Roach added fuel to the mental fire by claiming to be a dev working for a South American company that had the Sinneslöschen under it’s umbrella, they released Polybius but it unintentionally made people ill. This was all in an article posted up by a writer over at Gamepulse.co.uk (http://web.archive.org/web/20080507174244/http://bitparade.co.uk/modules/articles/article.php?id=21) they decided to probe this Steven Roach. His answers seem plausible but there are just too many issues with the legend and this “truth” for it to all be real.

Sinneslöschen translates as Sense Delete (through Google Translate) and at that stage this whole thing falls apart for me. The idea that the CIA would create a game that manipulates people to such a degree and then leaves this smug nod and wink to conspiracy theorists is just a little too sloppy.

When Slender Man was first launched onto the world from the Something Awful forums, there was an influx of fan art, youtube mini-series and games; Polybius is no different. There are many ‘versions’ of Polybius, all playable games that will give you a headache, are any of them genuine? Unlikely, as is always the case with Urban legends the facts get pushed aside quite quickly, and soon all you are left with is a crowdsourced/hivemind tale to freak people out.

In 2006 the Simpsons made a reference to the machine in the episode “Please Homer, Don’t Hammer ‘Em”, you will notice at the bottom of the machine it says “Property of U.S. Government”, the fact that the Simpsons is ragging on this story as well doesn’t do much for its legitimacy. So where does this all leave us? Well if nothing else this is a great urban legend, something that as gamers we are severely lacking, in this internet age we don’t have the joy of kids in the 70’s, the Bigfoots or the Chupacabras, it’s all too easy just to Google and disprove something, basically all I’m asking is that as nerds we just let this one slide and let’s collectively agree it’s true.

  By the mid-eighties, live-action superhero adventures were in a bit of a lull. The third and fourth cinematic outings of Superman, had been unmitigated disasters, leaving audiences to contemplate if it really needed anymore larger-than-life comic book adventures. However, by the close of the decade, studios were ready to try again, with big-screen versions of Batman, Dick Tracy and The Punisher all greenlit for production. Superheroes were back on the rise and Marvel sniffed an opportunity to once again take over the airwaves with a whole host of super-powered titans. The Incredible Hulk would return, and this time he was bringing some super-powered pals.

Affection for the show, cancelled in 1982, remained strong throughout the eighties, so studio heads, in search of success, decided to resurrect the green-skinned giant for a series of TV movies. As well as reintroducing Hulk-hounds to the adventures of Dr David Bruce Banner and his emerald-hued alter-ego a few years down the line, the TV movies were also intended to serve as pilots for potential new shows based on other Marvel characters. First aired in 1988, The Incredible Hulk Returns was to act as a backdoor pilot for a new series featuring Norse god of thunder, Thor, the first time another super-powered character had cropped up in the milieu of the show. This concept opened the door for the appearance of Daredevil in 1989’s Trial of the Incredible Hulk and though plans were put in place to introduce new incarnations of She-Hulk, Iron Man and The Chameleon in subsequent sequels, audiences never really took to Banner’s new fantastic friends.

Returns… is an interesting beast, introducing mystical elements to a show that had always strived to root its fantastic lead character in reality. Two years after the end of the Hulk series, Bill Bixby’s Dr Banner lives a peaceful life, shacked up with a pretty lady and is close to curing himself of the jade giant with the Gamma Transponder, a device he helped create. Just as Banner prepares to flick the switch, into his world walks Don Blake (Steve Levitt), a former colleague in possession of a mystic hammer which can summon ancient Norse warrior, The Mighty Thor.  Bad timing, as before you can say ‘Mjolnir,’ Blake summons the reckless, muscle-bound Asgardian who, looking more like a ludicrously fur-trimmed WWF wrestler than his comic book counterpart, starts acting like a big, dumb child. Acting more like a Scotsman than a Scandanavian, the petulant hammer-hurling hero (Eric Kramer  - Mr Belvedere/Bear from American Pie: The Wedding!) wrecks Banner’s lab, ruining the experiment, whilst in search of ‘a drink.’ This, of course, makes the good doctor quite angry, which ardent viewers will know is a really bad idea.

After Banner’s demented Lou Ferrigno-shaped Mr Hyde makes an appearance, the two titans do battle in an frightfully choreographed encounter. Under Nicholas Corea’s mediocre direction, Hulk moves perpetually in slow motion, and though Thor raises a few bushy eyebrows by actually being able to hurt the emerald-hued brute, the fight is a poorly-conceived damp squib yawn-fest. This Thor can’t fly or control lightning, rendering him little more than Hulk-with-a-hammer, so the fights resemble piss-poor wrestling matches with some sparks flung in for good measure.

The two champions quickly kiss and make up when sinister baddies, eager to get their mitts on the Transponder, kidnap Banner’s missus, forcing the doc to abandon hope of being cured in order to save the day. The show’s producers can barely disguise their eagerness for a spin-off, as what should be a fairly straightforward story, rapidly turns into The Thor Show, with the Norse warrior hogging screen-time, stealing Hulk’s thunder.

Testing the waters, laying foundations for a regular show, a laboured subplot follows Blake and Thor on a night out, offering more insight into their unconventional dynamic. Thor is adamant that “I need to drink, eat, laugh with a woman and fight with a man!”, so Blake takes him to a bikers bar, where the big fella pretty much fits right in. Interestingly, in his chirpy demeanour, brash behaviour and jolly smile, Kramer’s interpretation of Thor is an interesting forebear of Chris Hemsworth’s hugely successful 2011 big-screen take of the character. Smiling in the face of danger and punching men for fun, the affable character, though initially irritating, does kind of grow on you after a while. Levitt’s Blake, however, is less likeable, his floppy-haired, guffawing geek coming across as a bit of a weenie who, though sharing a quirky dynamic with the thunder god, may have been difficult to tolerate week-in, week-out.

These scenes are vital in conveying if a regular series could work and though they are fun, tonally they feel a little off. This is not the Hulk show we fondly remember – though the show’s concept was always fundamentally silly, audiences bought into it and accepted it with a degree of seriousness. Thor is a little too larger-than-life to fit in here, and the presence of the helmet-wearing, hammer-hurling goliath makes Hulk look even more absurd than usual.

Luckily, Ferrigno remains reliably awesome, still possessing the power to terrify with the sheer brute force of his imposing physicality. Sadly, his sturdy performance is failed by poor filmmaking decisions that render the Hulk an impotent passenger in his own film. There are some memorably cool action scenes, like when Thor and Jade Jaws combine forces to pluck a helicopter out of the skies, but the show’s budget never stretches far enough to make these scenes truly sizzle.

Suffice to say, though ratings for Return… were pretty solid, the Thor show never materialised. 2012’s Avengers Assemble would finally give audiences the Marvel Team-up they deserved, with modern filmmakers like Joss Whedon realising that to do these extraordinary heroes real justice, studios would need to gamble and make a really solid investment. It would have been interesting to see if a weekly Thor series could have worked, but with Hemsworth returning this year with Thor: The Dark World, it seems the thunder god is in safe hands for now.

1. Drop the price

The console hasn’t found it’s market it’s as simple as that. Unofficial price drops are running amok in the UK with supermarkets Sainsbury’s and ASDA and even tax dodging Amazon all dropping the price by nearly £100 since launch. This is with no official request from Nintendo, the downshot of this is that the supermarkets are clearly so inundated with stock that they need to clear warehouses and sell machines at what I can only assume is a loss. With Nintendo dropping the price officially it might be seen as a sign of weakness, developers decide that it would be an indicator of failure for the console and turn their backs even more. That being said if the price drops brings back that casual market that came for the Wii then maybe, just maybe it could entice the third parties in, and then the AAA’s could come rolling.

2. Release Games

There are 38 games (as of May 10^th 2013) for the Wii U released in Europe, that’s right, 38, out of those 13 are exclusive to the Wii U, of those 6 are just rehashes (the likes of Arkham City Armoured and Mass Effect 3 Wii U Edition). So to break this down, there are just 7 EXCLUSIVE and ORIGINAL games for the Wii U in Europe. 2 of those are fitness games. Clearly something has gone wrong here.

On April 19^th Injustice: Gods Among Us was released for the Wii U, a great game that I’m sure was a more than competent release, the next game to be released for the Wii U in Europe is Sniper Elite V2, a port, when is this game out? Why it’s May 21^st! That’s over a month without a release for a new system. It’s an awful state of affairs for a console that’s been out 6 months.

3. Get In Bed With the Indies

The PS Vita didn’t have the best of launches, only a hand full of games, most of those were fine but nothing special. Then silence, games got released occasionally, mainly JRPGs and other imports. Over the past month or two though the PS Vita has been back in the news, after a long period of quiet we suddenly see its title in the headlines, mainly because Sony has decided to take a bite out of the PC Indie market. Microsoft tried and failed with its indie love, they buried the indie games deep in the dashboard and quality control was lacking so the few times I did look through the list of releases all I saw was badly drawn cover art and games that were lesser rip offs of rip off games.

Nintendo should take a leaf out of Sony’s book, they should look beyond the AAA devs and get the indies on the system. To do this they need to lessen their dictator like grip on the eShop and allow people to submit with less stress and cost. Indies haven’t saved the Vita yet, but with Sony dropping the license fee to make games for them it’s clear that with Hotline: Miami and Thomas Was Alone and many others heading over this could be the start of a resurgence.

4. Ditch the Hubris

Hubris means excessive pride, arrogance or self-confidence; all of which Nintendo are horrendously guilty of. Yes they have earned our respect, they have been around since the early 80’s (technically the 1880’s actually), but that doesn’t allow them the right to be lazy. So far for the Wii U the only recognisable character they have gone with is a single Mario game in the form of Super Mario Bros U, this is not enough, just because they’re Nintendo doesn’t mean we will let them get away with this stuff anymore. The Wii U’s specs and gimmicks are essentially just a half step to a new generation. They’ve brought ‘some’ of the graphical capabilities up to current standard, and they released the pad, but then that’s it really, the pad can only be used by one player at a time, the others are using normal Wii controllers, which are rubbish.

5. Bring Back The Casual Market

The casual market is the only reason the Wii did well, I know that’s hard for some people to take but it’s true. The Wii had good games on a crap console. The Wii U has part of the casual market covered, it’s got the kids covered with Ben 10 and Spyro games, it’s got the Parents covered to an extent with fitness software, but there just isn’t that recognisable family market. Nintendo need to break out the big guns with some of their franchises, people who haven’t owned a Nintendo since the N64 could be tempted back with a good Mario game, a Zelda game or maybe even a decent Starfox game.

The one that could really sell the console though? The one that when mixed with a price drop and bundle release? Mario Kart, a game that since the SNES has been a great party games an known to more than a 3 generations now. 4 players on one console sat side by side racing and griefing, we know this sells consoles early in the generation, this was shown by the DS and the Wii version flying off the shelves. To my mind it’s a more popular series than Mario in terms of its spread over the age groups. With the other console manufactures getting ready to shoot their next gen wads Nintendo should have been rolling in the money of having nearly a years advance on them, instead they’re just wasting the time with whole months of no release. It’s time to crap or get off the pot Nintendo, we’ve already seen Sega take a dive a decade ago, and they had a decent console with good games, sure Nintendo has history but nostalgia isn’t a good enough reason for sales anymore.

The Thomas that the games title refers to is a polygonal shape that represents an AI entity who has to find his way from one side of a level to another. As the title suggests Thomas ‘was’ Alone and he is soon joined by a cast of different shaped polygonal AI all with differing abilities and personalities. The blocks don’t speak but their thoughts are wonderfully conveyed by humour writer and occasional actor Danny Wallace whom you may know as Shaun Hastings from the Assassin’s Creed games. His lines are brilliantly delivered and superbly written with more than a hint of Glados from Portal in the tone and delivery of the narration.

The Narrator Adds A Huge Amount Of Character.

That’s not the only similarity to Valve’s masterpiece, the gameplay feel almost like a 2D Portal with the basic premise of each level being to get from point A to point B by solving puzzles that get relatively tougher and more convoluted as the game progresses. The various different shapes need to help each other (some reluctantly) to complete the level, a gameplay tactic that really adds depth to the game.

For anyone familiar with the Playstation Minis brand you may recall a game called Where Is My Heart, a game that used a very similar mechanic to very similar effect and its when I realised this that I started picking at the threads of this game. To be fair the platforming physics feel great and as a simple game its great but, and I hate to say this; it feels like an iPhone game. Now please don’t get me wrong I love iPhone gaming but its a rear day when I would pay anything close to £8 for an iOS game. This brings up an important argument, is it fair to judge a game by how much it costs. Should a games worth really be measured by its hours to pounds ratio and the answer is of course not, but that doesn’t detract from the basic fact that Thomas Was Alone is a brilliant but extremely simple game that feels like it belongs in the Playstation Mobile section of the Vita store than the main store itself.

Having played the game on Vita and PS3 I have to say the game feels right at home on the Vita, the gameplay lending itself perfectly to handheld gaming, although the urge to finish one more level can have you reaching for the charger rather that doing anything productive. I guess the main criticism I can level at Thomas Was Alone then is that its all over too soon, the game has so many great ideas that it feels like the possibilities for this game were almost infinite so when the game finished I couldn’t help but be disappointed.

In summary could I recommend you part with your hard earned to play Thomas Was Alone, well yes I could, if you’ve read through this review and like what you hear then go for it. If however you are merely curious about it please wait for a price drop or sale.

Gameplay

+Super simple to pick up.

+Technically perfect.

-Some might say too simple.

Graphics

+Crisp, clear and concise.

-Not much variety.

Sound

+Beautiful score.

+Perfect narration

1. Solid Snake – Metal Gear Solid

Konami did everything in their power to make smoking uncool in the Metal Gear Series. But, the cigarette was in Snake’s mouth, so not even frequent warnings or your health actively dropping can stop the air of cool that can only be replicated by 1980’s action stars like Van Damme or Chuck Norris. Smoking in the Metal Gear series has been around since before there were androgynous lady boys, vampires, big robots and memes. Story wise they’re used as a constant in Snake’s life, he ends up carrying them in later games “Just for good luck” but in games like the first Metal Gear Solid you can actually use the smoke to show where IR Lasers are, so you know, smoking also has a practical use. Oh Snake also makes diazepam look cool too but it’s hard to make a list out of that.

2. Manny, And Everyone Else – Grim Fandango

The one good thing about being dead is that you’re dead, nothing more can be done to you, there isn’t much further you can fall, as such the poster children for smoking are the cast of Grim Fandango. With their constant puffing you really get the noir feel that the game is going for, this may be due to the 1940’s “what’s cancer?” vibe that riddles the game. The whole game is a constant homage to Casablanca, Día de Muertos (the Mexican holiday to honour the dead) and finally Art Nouveau architecture. None of these things would be complete without a bit of tobacco sprinkled lovingly on the top. Manny is a cool character, someone that’s trying to fight the man (or a death corporation in his case), save a beautiful woman/skeleton and just survive, add smoking into the fray and all the others a just heightened awesomeness. A character that is 1930’s and all “Damn the man, save the empire” whilst sparking up? that’s just great.

3. Sean Devlin – Saboteur

Stereotypes are a great thing, especially when mixed in with bad voice acting. With that thought we come to our next proposal for Top 5 Game Video Game Characters That Make Smoking Cool, Sean Devlin from Saboteur. As my name suggests (See Author Box below), I have some Irish blood in me, though I follow none of the stereotypes or racial cliché, actually I am quite into potatoes. My point is that I can live vicariously through Sean Devlin our Saboteur as he bombs it around Paris causing trouble, drinking, swearing, visiting ‘ladies of the night’, smoking and killing; actually I already do a couple of those, but I’ll never tell which. As suggested with my Grim Fandango spiel, I’m quite a fan of the 1920’s-1940’s era of the world, it’s just a shame that, the art and style of it was ruined by a few wars and near global poverty and death. Smoking is actually quite a big part of Saboteur, when you’ve stood still for 10 seconds you pull out a smoke and start puffing away, quite reminiscent to the early top down GTA games, that’s right kids, GTA used to be a top down game! If you made Sean Devlin get lung cancer or smoke 100 cigarettes, whichever came first, then you would be greeted with the bleep bloop of an achievement, GZ you now have 3rd stage melanoma!

4. Spy – Team Fortress 2

Team Fortress 2 portrays itself as this easy to get into and fun game, actually it’s like any other online team based shooter where everyone shouts at you for messing up. Because I wasn’t very good at it the few times I tried it I decided to go down the route of Spy, a character that doesn’t necasserily need to have a high kill count, as such I would just use their ability to make myself look like the enemy and skulk around their base. A lot of this list is about smokers who don’t make a big deal about it, they’re not like 16 year olds smoking for the first time and making sure the cool kids see them, these guys are going about their business and just showing their vice of choice (though killing is something else they all have in common). The Spy is putting his nuts on the line, sneaking about the enemy base, causing chaos and mischief all the while rocking a straight in the corner of his mouth, that’s dedication to the cause, that’s something I can get behind.

5. The Cast of – Yakuza 4

Smoking in Japan is a “generally” accepted thing. There are a few chain stores like Starbucks that have put in an outright ban, and a few prefectures here and there that has no smoking areas, but in a country where 1 in 4 people smoke and the majority of those are young to middle-aged men it’s no surprise that a game about the Japanese underworld, Yakuza 4, features the death stick so prevalently. I started playing Yakuza 4 a short while ago, late to the party I appreciate, and I’ve been having a blast with it, the fighting, the world and the writing is all great fun. I’ve started playing a game within the game, meta is my middle name, whenever a character like Akiyama sparks up in a cut-scene I try to match him. This has led to me having a quite bad cough, as it turns out Shun Akiyama is capable of knocking back a couple of smokes in the space of a 4 minute cut scene. With they’re annoyingly cool dress sense, the awesome hair and the bonus points for being Yakuza, or “slightly dodgy”, the cast of a Yakuza are a great advert for smoking, and caving someone’s skull in with a bicycle.

Back in 1978, Marvel, fresh from the success of the Incredible Hulk and Amazing Spider-Man TV shows, was looking for its next hero to be immortalised on the small screen. Rather than go with one of its more popular heroes, like Thor or Iron Man, Marvel went with the decidedly left field choice of master of the mystic arts, Doctor Stephen Strange. Co-created by Stan Lee and Steve Ditko in the 1960s, the wonderfully moustached Dr Strange got into various colourful, otherworldly scrapes in his adventures as Earth’s primary protector against magical and mystic threats. Though the comic had many followers, enchanted by its well-constructed, cohesive cosmology that featured nods to Eastern mysticism, Egyptian myths and all manner of weird and wonderful occult doctrines, it must have seemed like a big ask for the show’s creators to successfully translate the good doctor’s epically arcane exploits to the television screen.

Stepping up to this seemingly thankless task, writer/director Philip DeGuere takes the smart approach of grounding the doctor’s adventures in reality, de-emphasising some of the more flamboyant aspects of the comic book to create a more credible, believable world. That’s not to say that Doctor Strange’s universe is a dull place – far from it. With the aid of some impressive, spooky sets filled with fusty old antiques and gloomy, stylish, highly atmospheric lighting, Deguere’s take on the Marvel Universe casts a bewitching spell.

Into this creepy world swaggers the impressively manly Peter Hooten as charming psychologist Dr Stephen Strange. Hooten’s take on the character is hugely enjoyable, keeping things the right side of camp, presenting him as a hairy, burly rogue who rolls into work late with lipstick on his cheek and reeking of cheap perfume. Remarking that the perfume’s only cheap “because I gave it to her!”, Hooten’s doctor is unmistakeably a man’s man, a cocky Ron Burgundy in scrubs. Unbeknownst to him, Stephen’s world is about to be turned upside down by an encounter with John Mills’ mysterious stranger Thomas Lindmer, and the revelation that his enchanted ring, passed down to him by his father, makes him heir to the soon-to-be-vacant position of Sorceror Supreme.

Doctor Strange is a decent enough little fantasy-thriller, wisely not relying too much on special effects, focusing more on plot, character and performance. The effects budget seems to have largely been splurged on scenes set in the astral plane, which aren’t bad, all dark shadows and wild, fluorescent lighting, resembling the freaky, kaleidoscopic, lava-lamp wet dreams of Deep Purple. Opening scenes, set in some mysterious, doomful, but confidently realised parallel dimension, introduce us to our chief villainess, the gorgeous, deadly sorceress Morgan, portrayed by a young Jessica Walter (Lucille Bluth from Arrested Development!). Morgan receives orders from a frightening, barely glimpsed, fiery-eyed demonic master who orders her to carry out some vile deeds that involve the possession of a young woman named Clea (Eddie Benton).

The effects for Morgan’s dark overlord appear quite crude and clunky, but DeGuere is clever enough to never let us get a good look at the creature. We never really see much of anything in Doctor Strange, cleverly making us rely on our own imagination to fill in the gaps. As we have already seen, the paltry budgets afforded to many of Marvel’s live action efforts have proven to be their undoing, with directors suffering the quandary of having to work out how to bring these fantastic characters to life with little financial backing. Amazingly, DeGuere seems to have cracked it, so it seems a monumental shame that he wasn’t given the chance to do more.

Much of the pilot’s creepy mood is achieved through smart use of sound. For most of the show, Morgan doesn’t do much, save for standing around and looking menacing, but her ominous, insistent, funky guitar theme tune proves irresistible, letting us know that in no uncertain terms, this bitch is up to something. When Morgan clashes with Lindmer, though very little is seen, canny use of camera angles and sound effects imply that a monumental battle of invisible necromancy is going down. This is how you show magic with no money – DeGuere keeps things grounded and almost believable, crafting a superior, sombre, chilling mood piece.

The show’s main failing is that it takes forever to get where it’s going, with Stephen only finally assuming the mantle of Sorceror Supreme during its final, giddy act. Much of the plot is taken up with Stephen’s dealings with Clea, who becomes his patient. The doc suspects the girl is crazy, yet he recognises her from his dreams and totally fancies her, and so begins a slow-burning fantasy thriller that plods along at a frustratingly phlegmatic pace. The reluctant doctor takes an age to finally come round to the side of the angels, following a dalliance with the dark side where he spurns the wicked Morgan’s advances, but is spared because – oh yes – she can’t resist his rugged, beefy animal magnetism. Marvel fans would need to wait over three decades for the arrival of Thor to meet a movie hero quite so triumphantly and unapologetically sexy.

Ultimately, Doctor Strange is a mildly enchanting parable about accepting one’s destiny that explores some interesting themes. Straight-thinking psychiatrist Stephen starts out believing that evil is but a construct of the human mind, yet his adventures lead him to question everything he knows. Though he winds up looking ridiculous in the hellish bracelets, medallions and tunic that constitute his new costume, the pilot lays a lot of good groundwork and sets things up nicely for a regular weekly series. As the doctor’s comic book exploits have demonstrated, there is an infinite universe of kooky, spellbinding, supernatural possibilities to be explored.

Unfortunately, the pilot aired opposite all-conquering mini-series Roots and so was largely ignored. Rumours abound that Marvel are planning a new Doctor Strange movie as part of ‘Phase Three’ of their mega-successful Avengers movie universe. In the search for inspiration they could do much worse than to revisit this quaint, titillating, forgotten slice of TV magic.

Mercenaries 2

Creating a theme tune more awesome than the game itself

Mercenaries 2 was by no means a bad game; it was a satisfying enough addition to the open-world genre but generally unspectacular and ultimately forgettable. Its launch advert, on the other hand, proved a masterstroke in hype and one that still lingers long in the memory, remaining in the itunes libraries of gamers long after the game itself had left their possession. It has even spawned streams of remixes and tributes on Youtube using games from Halo to GMod. We would apologise in advanced for getting the tune stuck in your head for the rest of the day but it’s awesome, so no apology needed.

Anodyne

Releasing their game on The Pirate Bay

Piracy is, of course, a bad thing. The ability to download almost anything and everything without ever moving from your chair has had a massive impact on the entertainment industry, leading to a massive clampdown on sites such as Megaupload and fining those found responsible hundreds of thousands of pounds.

The creators of Anondyne though embraced the piracy – releasing their game for free on The Pirate Bay and paying $7 to place an advert linking to the game on the site’s front page. In an interview with the Scratched Disc Podcast, co-creator Sean Hogan explained the decision: “talking to people pirating it, and being OK with that and accepting it was going to happen. It works well being friendly to people pirating it. They are going to pirate it anyway, you may as well be friends with them.”

It was certainly a risk that paid off. After getting articles on torrenting sites and making it all the way to the fabled front page of reddit, Anodyne created a hype it would never have previously dreamed to achieve. Despite openly giving it away for free for a week, the creator’s blog explains how the game went on to sell very well during the promotion period.

Game Dev Tycoon

Sticking a middle finger up at the pirates

Another genius use of piracy but this time from a completely different angle. Much like Anodyne, the creators of game Dev Tycoon, a simulator where the player has to make games and see how well they sell, released a pirated version of the game themselves after seeing nearly all of the initial copies being played by pirates.

In a beautifully ironic twist, the creators of GDT released one subtle (but brilliant) addition to the coding; gamers who pirated the game saw their in-game creations pirated, resulting in a massive loss in profits and making it impossible to complete. The pirates then complained about their games in their pirated game being pirated, giving birth to one of the best gaming stories this year and giving the game the attention it would never have previously received (and also leading to the most uses of pirate in sentences in gaming sites across the web).

Minecraft

The youtube sensation

When Youtube was in its infancy many years ago, no one would have predicted that the prominence of chocolate-themed weather songs and the history of human being’s movements to music would be usurped by videos of people young and old playing  with the next-generation LEGO. Minecraft wasn’t even in its full release stage by the time it became an online sensation and has since gone on to be one of the best selling and most popular games of the generation.

Minecraft’s success though is a unique one in modern day gaming. It is not one built by AAA development studios, it did not have a multi-million pound advertising campaign behind it. It was just a humble indie game made by Markus “Notch” Persson that proved word of mouth and viral buzz can be just as powerful as international advertising campaigns. Much of the game’s success can be contributed to its community built through the internet (mainly Youtube), where players can share their amazing creations around the world.

Star Wars: The Old Republic

Cinematic sweetness

If any game didn’t need a hype machine, it is an MMO set in the Star Wars Universe. Despite years of seeing their beloved franchise saturated with merchandise and less than stellar games, fans continue to lap up anything from the mind of George Lucas. SWTOR needed only to be announced to send loyal fans into a frenzy excitement and eager anticipation. Instead we were treated to quite possible the greatest video game trailer ever, a brilliant CGI five-minute short arguable better than the entire prequels. It was the first of many cinematic trailers for the game, which have since been stitched together into a 15 minute short film. 

Electro Bobble is an indie title from game devs Diado Gaming; it sees you playing as a cute little blob of watery, gooey, adorable, squishy-ness that you must guide through level after level of tricky platforming action. The screen never stops moving up and your hands will never stop shuffling those W,A,S,D keys; all in a frantic attempt to not only avoid the endless oblivion of the bottom of your monitor, but also the swarms of bullets fired at you from an infinite stream of foes.

Let me begin by saying you will probably die, a lot; upon my first foray into Electro Bobble I found myself falling pitifully to my death not once but thrice times in a row. It was like trying to watch a jellyfish grab hold of an ice cube in the Sahara Desert. This is due to some rather exaggerated jumping controls that, at first, may make you think you will never get the hang of things.

But believe me, you will, and once you do, and you finally get into the swing of climbing up and up and up, you will just want to reach further and further into the neon heights of Electro Bobble’s crisp and colourful world.

Graphically, things are very clear and it does not take too long to figure out what each enemy does and how you can avoid it. The blocks that you jump on, for example, are all coloured differently depending on what traits they have (red ones vanish, orange ones don’t etc) and it is this graphical simplicity that allows for a great sense of easy accessibility and surprising depth. Judging when, and where you should jump to next is all about being able to recognise quickly what lies ahead; this is something Diado Gaming have done rather beautifully with the games sharp and bright visuals.

In fact, I found the platforming to be such fun I often didn’t shoot a single projectile and if you notice I have not mentioned it yet in this review. This is simply because I think the game is strong enough without it; the addictive quality this game has comes from its slick and speedy run, jump and dodge action, not from its point and click shooting galleries.

Having said that, the boss battles here are absolutely bonkers and lets the shooting shine through that little bit more; trying to fire bullets at a thunder cloud whilst jumping like a lunatic sounds like something to get put away in a mental asylum for. Whilst these are not the majority of the experience, it is great fun and a great challenge; the difficulty here is supreme and quite unforgiving. Do not be shocked if you become bosom buddies with the game over screen; it is the start of that legendary gaming catchphrase “just one more go”.

Throughout my time with Electro Bobble I kept thinking “this would of stolen many a coin back in the arcades” and that is the beauty of it. This is one of those little games that can kill your boredom as quick as lightning can strike and will keep you coming back time after time. This is a 1995, 16 bit, hyped up sugar rush and I hope that this little, adorable blob doesn’t come back down from the clouds anytime soon.

Gameplay

+ Quick, addictive platforming

+ Clever, original boss battles

- Superfluous shooting mechanic

- Unforgiving difficulty

Graphics

+ Crisp, clear visuals

+ Adorable hero

+ Interesting boss design

Sound

+ Sharp sound design

+ No loss of clarity amidst the action

- No real, memorable OST

]]> http://pixelbedlam.co.uk/electro-bobble-pc-review/feed/ 0 http://pixelbedlam.co.uk/top-5-characters-we-want-from-injustice-gods-among-us-dlc/ http://pixelbedlam.co.uk/top-5-characters-we-want-from-injustice-gods-among-us-dlc/#comments Wed, 01 May 2013 09:03:05 +0000 Ruaidhri http://pixelbedlam.co.uk/?p=3796 Injustice has been keeping a number of the team busy over the past couple of weeks, Twitter arguments over characters and story have erupted like a rather pathetic nerdy volcano. As interest has started to contemplate waning the thought of DLC enters our mind. A couple of days ago the intergalactic douche Lobo reared his head as the first of the DLC characters we can expect to find on our character select screens in the coming months. What an awful choice in my humble opinion. Lobo jumps between being a great character and a one joke comedian. Having him in Injustice does nothing for me, they might as well announced Martian Manhunter.

There was last week a supposed leak of upcoming DLC’s, featuring Batgirl, Power Girl/General Zod, Scorpion and Lobo. None of these really do anything for me so I thought I’d put together a list of the few characters that may actually make me pay out for DLC and even the Season Pass.

Booster Gold / Blue Beetle

Booster Gold and Blue Beetle are the epitome of bromance in the DC Universe, for years they bounded around together until Blue Beetle met his end in the absolutely amazing graphic novel “Countdown to Infinite Crisis”. Two buddies who don’t take much seriously but can solve a crime and kick arse with the best of them. They’ve always been considered second tier heroes and I’m glad, it means that writers were able to take more risks with their work and enjoy the characters more without worrying too much about a hardcore fanbase. Being cult heroes, bringing these guys in would be awesome. Pressing B or Circle on all characters in Injustice changes a fight style or weapon, but with these guys swapping them in or out with a press of a button would work, it doesn’t change the game to a tag scenario which I’m sure NetherRealm intentionally avoided but it would add a new element.

Zatanna

It would seem that the developers were struggling on the female front with Injustice (and Wonder Woman specifically, BOOM BOOM!), they brought in Hawkgirl, Wonder Woman and Catwoman, all justified characters with rich histories, but, then there’s her, Killer Frost. I mean NetherRealm should be capable at this stage having a character in a fighting game that isn’t based on Sub Zero. Female villains are hard to come up with I agree, there are some good ones, but on the most part they are one trick ponies, heroes however have a brilliant selection of females. I was stuck between suggesting for this list either Black Canary or Zatanna, Canary is a great character and if she was in the story her connection with Green Arrow would have been great however I secretly hope for Zatanna to pop up. Magic is an ability rife in the DC Universe so its apparent lack of appearance in Injustice is quite odd, they seemed to have glossed over the whole concept and just brought in the standards of Mutant, Alien, God or Beefcake. Zatanna’s stories may be lacking but the range of entertaining moves and specials she could have produced would have added to the game no end.

Doctor Fate

As I mentioned above I felt magic characters were severely lacking in Injustice. And to my mind there is no one as old school and as magic as Doctor Fate. With a magic Egyptian cape, amulet and helmet this guy can do it all. Tell people their future, fly, super strength, materialise things, destroy things hell somewhere in his Swiss Army Knife of abilities he can probably make a pretty good mojito. The character is interesting without all that jazz, essentially trapping people into the life of super-heroics Doctor Fate’s helmet is its own entity. Confusing and stalwart, Doctor Fate is a character that looks cool, has awesome abilities and would bring the magic back to Injustice.

Arsenal

Roy Harper started life as Speedy, Green Arrow’s sidekick. After stints with Teen Titans and more recently Young Justice, Roy decided to get hooked on heroin. After that he went undercover and slept with an assassin called Cheshire and then his son died in an attack, oh and he lost his arm. Basically life hates Roy Harper and that’s why I love him. When life gives you lemons, say screw the lemons, get a bionic arm and become a hyper-violent anti-hero. Basically the violence, the weapons and the attitude would all mean that Arsenal, as he is now known, would just be an awesome character to play as.

The Question

I actually know very little about Question, all of my experience of him has been from the 52 series of comics and his brilliant paranoid P.I. routine on Justice League: Unlimited. I don’t know his moves or much of his back story except for what I have read online and seen on the cartoon. This is why he needs to be in the game, getting hold of Question comics is hard, if NetherRealm brought him in this could make DC sit up and re-issue a load of his comics. I admit this is head in the clouds dreaming, but hey, I want a conspiracy theory loving faceless nut job and I want him NOW!

Please allow me to precursor this review with the following, I am not a long-term Turn Based Strategy gamer, since playing the game and writing this review I have discovered that the Eador games and Turn Based Strategy games are a much-loved area of PC gaming that has, to be perfectly honest, skipped me by. As such this review is written from the perspective of someone who is new to the series and the genre.

An old man turns up in a village, he spots a young child, he likes the child and sees their potential, he pays the child’s parents gold, the man now owns the child. Yes this sounds like a disturbing plot, and that’s because we are jaded by scandals and sickos in the world. In the world of Eador this plot seems mildly logical. From here you are given the opportunity to choose your class, but not race. For a game that in the end becomes one of the most complicated gaming experiences of my life, the game has reduced the role play aspect. Later in the game you choose alliances with various races, be it Undead or Elves. For now I went with my current Green Arrow obsession and chose the Ranger class. Keeping my distance and do damage is my general go to tactic in strategic games.

‘Turn Based Strategy’ games are to me the closest you will get to a board game in digital form, short of playing Monopoly or Cluedo online. The thrust of the game is to win skirmishes, the battlefield is covered in a hexagonal grid, and here we have our board for the game. Yourself and some AI team mates on one side, and your opponents on the other. Using your characters own abilities and stats complimented by a team of AI, that in my case were made up of melee red shirts, you must kill all enemies. Like in most tabletop battle games your characters have a set number of spaces they can move, using this number in conjunction with attacks, and troop placement, it provides a brilliantly exciting battle. This is the best part of the game for me as it was actually a simple process, everything else is complicated, more complicated than I’d care to admit. The tutorial took you through a battle in relatively simple terms, clicking through the text scrolls I understood my objectives and basic tactics. Then other elements were thrown in, for example on the world map you can choose to explore a location or skip it by.

Imagine the world was kind of flat, and then someone strong with a hammer, lets for argument’s sake call him Jerry, comes in and smashes the world with said hammer. Jerry would then have many pieces of the same world floating around, this is the setting for Eador: Masters of the Broken World, Shards floating in space..Minus Jerry. Each Shard has its own feel, enemies, style and “chosen child taken by an old man”. The Shards effect your battlefield, they could produce more rough terrain or more defense, swamps slow you down but height can aid your attack. You in your infinite, slightly megalomaniac, wisdom have decided that owning all the shards is the way forward. Whilst playing Eador it’s very easy to get confused and think you are actually the bad guy in the fantasy realm, but no matter, I had a job to do and by god I was going to do it.

This game is deep, painfully deep. Whilst both exploring and fighting you also have to manage loot that you pick up from fallen enemies or buy from the shops, class specific armour and weapons always interests me in RPGs. I love finding that new bow or leather armour that makes me feel hardcore for a few rounds. Put on top of that you also have to buy and manage troops and the game starts to get a bit too deep, on top of that there is a whole sub game of taking over areas and building new cities, in which you are given far too many building options with a cryptic way of showing what other buildings are required before you can access the one you want. Some may see this depth as a positive, and on the most part I did, I just wish the game was on my side and willing to hold my hand rather than just use their hand to slap some of my teeth out. When contending with followers or “acolytes” as I liked to refer to them it’s easy to think these minions can look after them selves, but no, they sometimes get their pants in a twist and decide a revolt is in order, it’s like they don’t want me to try to take over every Shard I see.

I played this on my laptop, my laptop isn’t a gaming rig however it does have a quite beefy selection of RAM and the graphics card hasn’t had issues before, so for a game that I had presumed would be quite simple to run it turned out to be painfully intensive on my machine. Frame rate issues plague the game and despite my machine meeting required specs I just didn’t stand a chance. Updates have been released since that supposedly fix these issues but I am yet to see huge improvements. I turned resolution and details down to low which did somewhat reduce game fun but it did mean it was playable. One thing about the resolution, I only realised after about 45 minutes that none of the games resolution settings were usable for my widescreen laptop, I realised that the top of the shop screen was cut off, not a game breaker but annoying. The game is also slightly temperamental, it’s crashed numerous times for me, not allowed me to click end turn or just hung for a minute before moving on. Even with all of these issues the game is still a ball to play. The presumption and hope are that Snowbird Games releases some more updates to just iron out these problems at which point it will be a great and immersive game.

Fans of genre will be happy with the complexity and depth of the game but people new to the series or turn based strategy games may want to start somewhere simpler to ease them in. The game has so many little features that it would take far too long for me to comprehend them and explain them, some aid the game in its aim but others just are the icing on the cake of complication. There’s a lot to recommend here, but with gripes holding it back this game may best be kept for the hardcore.

Gameplay

+Deep and satisfying

-Scarey to players new to genre

-Tutorial is a slog and confusing

Graphics

+Really well presented

-AMAZINGLY computer intensive, despite looking quite simple

Sound

+Soundtrack is up there with the best, really nice fantasy affair

Capitalising on the runaway success of 2012’s unstoppable super-powered spandex smorgasbord Avengers Assemble, Marvel Studios have recently wrapped filming on the Joss Whedon developed Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. television pilot. Notable, not just for resurrecting fan’s favourite character Agent Coulson, but also for being Marvel’s first attempt at crafting a live action TV show since the folly that was 2006’s Blade: The Series, S.H.I.E.L.D. sees the comics giant dipping its toe back into waters that have not always been kind to them. Though the last decade has seen Marvel reap massive financial rewards on the big screen, for decades Stan Lee’s House of Ideas have attempted to crack the formula for a successful television series, with decidedly mixed results.  Though the triumphant 1970s Bill Bixby/Lou Ferrigno starring Incredible Hulk really helped put Marvel on the map, there have been plenty of aborted attempts at bringing cosmically powered heroes to the small screen that some true believers would rather were never spoken of again.

Come with me now on a journey into mystery as we unearth the top 5 forgotten Marvel TV pilots!

5. GENERATION X

In 1996, after the silver screen failures of Howard the Duck, Captain America and Dolph Lundgren’s Punisher, Fox TV decided that perhaps the safe money lay in putting larger-than-life comic book heroes back on TV, where the Hulk and Spider-Man shows had always been reliable ratings-spinners. Fox acquired the rights to Scott Lobdell and Chris Bachalo’s hip, trendy ‘Junior X-Men’ title,  Generation X, that they attempted to package as a sort of grungy Beverly Hills 90210 with super powers

Though built on the neat concept of a school training teen misfit mutants to use their powers for good, a full decade before X-Men: First Class, the show’s extended TV movie pilot is sadly hampered by lacklustre scripting and a shoestring budget. Some of the casting choices, such as TV veteran Jeremy Ratchford’s affable turn as diddly-dee, most-Irish-man-alive Banshee, and General Hospital’s Finola Hughes as a sultry British psychic mega-bitch, lingerie enthusiast Emma Frost, are suitably heroic. Sweet Valley High’s Amaralis also gives a delightfully sassy turn as ‘near-perfect’ mutant babe M, who owns every scene she’s in, particularly during a fairground set-piece where her skills on the Hammer Game leave the local jocks in a sweat, unsure whether to be jealous or utterly smitten. It’s a scene that perfectly captures the spirit of the classic comic book series and highlights the potential of a seriously beguiling character. However, cooler characters from the comic, like shape-shifter Husk and the horribly disfigured Chamber are jettisoned, no doubt due to there being no earthly way the show’s clearly modest effects budget could possibly do them justice.

Fan favourites like Jubilee and Skin remain, though characterisation is scant, and the special effects for their mutant powers are risible. Whenever he is called upon to use his epidermis-extending abilities, poor Agustin Rodriguez’ Skin bears hilarious similarities to a contorted, shiny plastic Stretch Armstrong doll. Also, it’s painfully obvious that Suzanne Davis’ Buff (a new, super-strong character created just for the show), who wears baggy sweaters to hide her unnatural muscle mass, is clearly replaced by a beefcake body double whenever she’s required to show off her guns.

The shoddy effects are, of course, forgivable. Fans could always suspend their disbelief whenever poor Bill Bixby stubbed his toe and morphed, unconvincingly, into Ferrigno’s jingoistic jade giant, because they were taken in by the work of solid, absorbing writing. Generation X is cheap, cheerful fun but, despite having a feature-length runtime, doesn’t spend sufficient time letting us get a feel for these kids. For a pilot to lead to more adventures, it’s essential for a show to lay foundations, but Generation X leaves too many of its characters, such as the intriguing, matter-absorbing Mondo, as relative blank slates, preferring to afford way too much screen-time to its decidedly shonky villain, portrayed by Max Headroom’s Matt Frewer.

Frewer, calling to mind a manic, early career Jim Carrey, is hypnotically OTT as wildly gesticulating, two-hobnobs-short-of-a-biscuit-barrel dream-manipulator Russell Tresh, but his fast-talking, scenery-gnawing theatrics quickly become tiresome. It takes an age for Tresh to actually cross paths with our heroes, and when he does, the encounter is muddled, bewildering and contrived. Tresh, who just happens to have previous beef with Frost, has the technology to invade dreams and he needs mutant brain juice (or something) to make his machine work properly. In a succession of hideous ‘dream sequences,’ filled with dismal CGI and awful neon lighting reminiscent of an 80s softcore porn flick, Tresh unlocks the power of the mind, giving him the power to – I shit you not – make his enemies fart in unison. It must be difficult to craft a superhero epic with no money, but this is just mental.

After a whole lot of befuddling exposition, teen growing pains drama (“Home sucks! Freedom rocks!”), and many, many scenes of Frewer doing silly accents, finally there is an infuriatingly brief final battle where each of our Gen Xers gets to use their powers for about two seconds each. The whole thing reeks of a fantastic opportunity missed, completely ballsed up at the script stage. Factor in some completely unnecessary swearing, sex references and the decision to change Jubilee’s character from Chinese to white American, and you’re left with a curious, uninvolving little oddity that doesn’t seem to know who its audience is.

As evidenced by the Avengers’ astonishing success at the box office, it seems clear that superhero properties require a solid investment, not just of cash, but of thought, care and a little respect for the parent title, in order for them to work. Joss Whedon’s sterling work with Marvel’s Greatest Heroes has highlighted the importance of affording these extraordinary characters the love and respect they deserve and one can only hope that his S.H.I.E.L.D. show will follow suit. Sadly, the makers of this mediocre mutant mess didn’t seem to know what they were doing from the get-go, leaving us with a largely forgotten pilot that will leave many to ponder what amazing adventures might have been…

Like many other iOS apps published by Chillingo, Madmonster is at heart a very simple game. As the name would suggest, players control a monster that is not at all calm, hell bent on destroying everything and anything in sight. Controls are expectedly simple; left and right movement can either be controlled by touching either side of the screen or tilting the phone.

The black hole power-up sucks objects towards the player, making escalation a breeze

The premise of Madmonster is to smash into enemies (or aren’t they really heroes?) trying to stop you, which will send your monster hurtling upwards. There are different layers of enemies, starting off with ground troops before progressing to helicopters and eventually stations in outer space. This is what provides the groundings for the platform elements which form the basics of the game.

In the normal mode, each mission sets out various objectives that the player must complete; these are usually very similar and will require an X amount of a certain enemy to be destroyed, a number of combos to be performed or for the players to stay air born for a set amount of time.

Madmonster’s challenge comes from its health system in which the player’s life slowly drains if the monster goes too long without smashing into objects. Health regenerates through earning combos, which are achieved by smashing into enemies in quick succession. Once space has been reached the player’s monster can smash back down to earth, allowing for combinations to be continued.

Seeing how high you can get is good fun. It’s a shame there aren’t more height based objectives.

It is a satisfying enough concept that creates enough of a challenge to make Madmonsters addicting but it is also one that can prove highly frustrating. Among the large variety of enemies and objects that can be destroyed are asteroids, which move across the screen before disintegrating in the atmosphere. With a slowly degenerating health-bar applying time pressure from the background, nothing is more frustrating than simply not being able to find any of this pesky space rocks. In one run through over 100s of planes, helicopters and satellites were hit without problem, yet only eight of the ten asteroids needed to progress had been hit. The world of Madmonster may be ravaged by giant, angry, monsters but they are certainly safe from the events of Deep Impact or Armageddon. The exact same level was completed on the next attempt, meaning progression could be attributed to pot luck rather than skill.

In an apparent effort to raise frustration levels from Nic Cage in Vampire’s Kiss to Arnie in Kindergarten Cop, elixirs must be used to continue a failed run-through. These are picked up sporadically through the game or can be purchased via micro-transations. It seems a fair enough system until you realise that after each failure the number of elixirs required to continue doubles, meaning that 69p you paid for five can disappear in a flash.

Micro-transactions are another source of slight annoyance in Madmonster. They come in the game’s shop, in which players can upgrade their monsters, power-ups, items or buy new monsters. This in itself is no crime, shops with the options of buying in-game coins or using money is certainly nothing new in the world of arcade iOS games. The limited number of coins given out during runs can make mico-transactions feel like a necessary route rather than a nice added bonus.

Madmonster also includes a Time Attack mode, which in truth feels like a missed opportunity. After selecting how long the run will be (either 30, 60 or 90 seconds long) three random objectives are generated before you select what enemies will appear in the level. That’s it. It would have been great to have a score-based mode rather than objective, setting players free to crash and smash their way through a minute and a half of a commute.

Despite its flaws, the game gets a lot right. With 60 missions spread over six levels, each with their own unique design, there is plenty of longevity and variety to entertain the player and give them their money’s worth. Every dozen or so levels a boss in thrown into the mix, adding a bit of freshness to the play. Power-ups and different monster abilities also spice gameplay up, even if it is a bit of a grind to unlock some of them. Madmonster is also a great looking game; enemies and backgrounds are very well detailed.

Any iPhone 4 or 3GS owners looking for purchase the game should be wary of slight frame-rate problems in-game. It is nothing game-breaking but the game noticeably slows when activating a smash or when things on screen get hectic. In fairness to the developers, a recent update has improved this problem significantly so it is not out of the question it will be eliminated completely with future updates.

Madmonster isn’t a groundbreaking game on the iOS platform. It is, though, a fun way to blast away a few minutes on the go and its addictive nature is an indication of the game’s quality. unfortunately often frustrating challenges coupled with a micro-transaction system tilted ever so slightly away from the luxury and towards the necessary means Madmonster falls just short of being a great game.

Gameplay

+Simple and addictive

+Lots of power-ups and upgrades to keep things fresh

- Challenges can be frustrating

-Players can be pushed towards micro-transactions

Sound

+Arcadey tune compliments gameplay well

Graphics

+Great detail

+Each level feels varied

- Frame-rate can stutter on older phones

Jasper Kyd

Stand Out Track: ‘Ezio’s Family’

Jesper Kyd has produced a lot of music that we now associate with certain franchises, be it Hitman’s slow but paced pieces or Assassin’s Creed wonderful mix of its source material with a modern twist. Assassin’s Creed II was the epitome of this, tracks like ‘Ezio’s Family’ just produce a wonderful image from the music alone of Renaissance Italy but with the bass and guitar to provide tension, these tracks do a wonderful job of symbolically evoking the story of the game, a modern man just visiting the past. For one reason or another Jesper didn’t work on the latest Assassin’s Creed and although that had great tracks like ‘Homestead’ on there it just wasn’t the same emotion produced. Bring back Jesper for Assassin’s Creed IV, or just stop making them for a bit, either way Ubisoft I’d be fine with.

Bastion Original Soundtrack

Darren Korb

Stand Out Track: ‘In Case Of Trouble’

A soundtrack, a voice and a game all coming together to produce something special. I will probably talk a lot in this piece about how, in a good example, the soundtrack becomes something more than just the music in the background, it brings a new angle to the game and to the experience for the player. I’m not going to bring out the big guns of hyperbole and pretend that they are a character in themselves like pretentious people say about Bioshock’s Rapture, but I will say a good soundtrack is something that is an integral part of the game, something that with any other sequence of notes wouldn’t have had the same impact. Bastion is the prime example, the world when mixed with the wonderful voice over is just topped off with a mix of Asian and Deep South style of music to make something greater than the sum of its parts.

Black Mages II: The Skies Above

The Black Mages

Stand Out Track: ‘The Skies Above’ or ‘Matoya’s Cave’

Nobuo Uematsu is a legend, and I don’t mean that in a way that the British youth say, that kind of disgusting use of the British language is why we’re in such trouble; “He’s a ledge” oh piss off. Nobuo is a true legend, someone that has had a long and refined career in producing some of the greatest soundtracks for some of the greatest games coming out of Japan. His career started in 1986 with Cruise Chaser Blassty [Note: No I haven't heard of it either], since then he has produced music for Final Fantasy, Chrono Trigger and Blue Dragon. The Black Mages is Nobuo’s band, they have produced a number of albums but number 2, The Skies Above, is the one I heartily recommend. It features songs from the majority of Final Fantasy games brought up to date with studio recordings rather than 8/16 bit songs. What’s great about this album and The Black Mages is that they don’t just bring the songs up to date, they take the tunes you will remember from childhood and put a twist on them about half way through, whether it’s Matoya’s Cave from Final Fantasy I getting a pop jazz swing style or The Skies Above from Final Fantasy X suddenly breaking into a Dragonforce power rock ballad with an opera singer rocking the vocals. The album boils down to ‘Songs we know done in a way we don’t’.  And that’s what most of this list is to me, the distortion of expectations, sure Hanz Zimmer does a belting score, but it’s the same every time, these albums are different enough to make us as gamers sit up and say “oh there’s more to games than graphics, music matters too”.

Halo 3: ODST Original Soundtrack

Martin O’Donnell & Michael Salvatori

Stand Out Track: ‘Overture’

For those who have had a severe head injury recently and are not sure, an overture in games soundtracks is generally the main theme and something you’ll hear throughout the game. It’s cliché of me to say the stand out track on this album is the Overture but it’s the truth, as I said above the point of this list is to give suggestions to people on what they should try to listen to, breaking conventions with soundtracks, essentially what we know from a series and diverting our expectations, and the Overture does just that. ODST was going to be a DLC expansion for Halo 3 but instead got its own retail release. This is easily my favourite Halo game and is actually one of my favourite games I’ve ever played. It’s not because of the combat, which is standard Halo affair, it’s the world and the feel this game puts onto the player. The fact that the soundtrack starts with the sound of rainfall says a lot, this game is tonally different to its predecessors. You are essentially a lost lamb in the night, a whole city is against you and it’s raining. The soundtrack still has it’s epic tracks like all of the Halo soundtracks, but it’s mixed here with Jazz undertones, the gloom of Blues runs through the tracks evoking a darker world than our previous endeavors with the brightly coloured grunts.

Journey Original Soundtrack

Austin Wintory

Stand Out Track: ‘Nascence’

Journey is a game that has been littered with so many awards that at this stage there really is no one left to thank at the podium other than some guy they once walked past who pointed out they had dropped a coin on the floor. The game itself is a desolate but beautiful experience, with no real script to speak of the game relies on the world and the music to get its various messages across. The world is simple and the music matches that, tracks like ‘ Nascence’ and ‘The Crossing’ epitomise the world with music. Many have said that they will now cry just listening to the soundtrack, I personally wouldn’t go that far, but I will say it’s an awesome album that is easy to chill out to on a Sunday afternoon.

The Legend of Zelda 25th Anniversary

Koji Kondo

Stand Out Track: ‘The Legend of Zelda 25th Anniversary Medley’

I’ve never been a huge fan of the Zelda games, or rather the newer ones. I loved Legend on the NES and Link to the Past is one of my favourite SNES games from my childhood, but as soon as the series hit the N64 my interest waned and the idea of doing dungeons 4 times just with a different outfit didn’t appeal to me anymore. That being said something I’ve always kept up with is the always awesome soundtracks. This soundtrack does a wonderful job of bringing even the older tracks up to modern standards with a full orchestral backing. The music is both grandiose but also fantastical and simple in their nature. You get the ‘Small Village’ feel from certain tracks and the ‘Big Battle’ from others. This soundtrack should be owned by all gamers not only from a history of it but the retelling of some classic Zelda songs. This CD isn’t cheap or easy to get hold of, Ebay and Amazon Market Place are your friends here, it’ll probably set you back about $20/£15 if you’re lucky, but it’s worth it.

Red Dead Redemption Original Soundtrack

Various Artists

Stand Out Track: ‘Far Away’

There are three ways Rockstar could have gone with this soundtrack, the first was to be authentic, lots of wailing violins/fiddles with a haunting guitar. The second would be to re-appropriate songs from the classic spaghetti westerns of the 1960′ and 1970′s. Finally they could have just brought in some new blood and gone a bit left field, more recently done with Django Unchained. Rockstar went for all three of these options. The first couple of tracks on the album ‘Born Unto Trouble’ ‘The Shootist’ and ‘Dead End Alley’ is basically what we perceive to be accurate music of the times-ish, then we launch into ‘Horseplay’ something that would have been perfect for any Spaghetti Western of old with music from an Italian artist, then we get into what everyone has as their stand out moment from the game. It’s a moment that on paper sounds stupid, after many hours of riding around you are finally allowed to head south, you are crossing the border into Mexico, as you start the ride which will take a few minutes a few random guitar plucks are heard, then they slowly find a rhythm and then the voice, Jose Gonzales sings ‘Far Away’, a modern original song, out-of-place in terms of musical styling but perfect for that very specific moment in the game.

Trine

Ari Pulkkinen

Stand Out Track: ‘Trine Main Theme’

When people use words to describe certain pieces of music I find it frustrating, people using terms like Haunting or Emotional just gets to me. When talking about the Trine soundtrack, it is one of the few times people will hear me say them. I find the main theme of this game so creepy and yet hopeful and I realise how much of a douche that makes me sound but it’s true. I am writing this article and with that comes the responsibility of being subjective, this soundtrack is my weakness, I admit it’s not a life changing album or game, but to me it’s great, every track is done with the theme and content of the game in mind, the mystical and fantastical world is all captured musically by Ari Pukkinen and when mixed with a game that is as fun as this I can’t help but sell out and recommend both whole heartily.

Unchartered 2: Among Themes

Greg Edmonson

Stand Out Track: ‘A Rock And A Hard Place’

So if I’m honest this soundtrack is VERY similar to the first game’s, but then so is the gamplay, BOOYAH! I actually only recently finished Uncharted 2 (I wrote about my Late To The Party experience here). Upon finishing I realised I was an idiot for not finishing the game sooner, one of the many reasons I should have was because I have been listening to the soundtrack for years, even without the context of the game this soundtrack is just brilliant. The soundtrack is such a mixture, tracks like ‘A Rock and A Hard Place’ are your usual big orchestral affair, but then that’s followed by ‘The Road To Shambala’ which on one hand is a traditional Asian piece of music mixed with sampling, a drum machine and Gregorian chanting. What makes this soundtrack great is that it is like the first game’s, but it’s been essentially redone with the Eastern setting of the game, this just makes sense, we’re playing with the same characters but on the other side of the world so why not just transpose the soundtrack like we have the characters. I love that fact a setting of game modifies the soundtack we all know.

The Greatest Video Game Music 1 & 2

London Philharmonic Orchestra and Andrew Skeet

Stand Out Track: ‘Advent Rising: Muse’

A couple of the albums I’ve spoken about here are slight cop outs, The Greatest Video Game Music 1 & 2 are essentially like me answering the question “what’s your favourite album by Queen” with “the Greatest Hits”. This is a compilation of, as the titles suggest, The Greatest Video Game Music. However, both albums are filled with, well, filler. Together the two albums are a great ride through history and the chance again to listen to some brilliant tracks played by the always, and obviously, wonderful London Philharmonic Orchestra. ‘Advent Rising: Muse’ is the stand out track for me, this is despite me never knowing of the game or the track before, it is an awesome track that just uses vocal work with the orchestra so well. Unfortunately you do then have tracks like ‘Call of Duty 4′ which is neither here nor there and ‘Call of Duty 2′ which feel like they were just put there because they would sell albums. Skyrim, Deus Ex, Tetris and even Angry Birds all have the orchestral adaptations that make their soundtracks sound new and at times bigger than they were originally intended. For those wishing to start a collection of Video Game Soundtracks these albums seem like the safest place to start, somewhere reasonably cheap with tracks you know from across the ages done with a real affection for their source and not the usual snobbery that comes with the judgement of games.

Special Mention

TRON: Legacy (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)

Daft Punk

Stand Out Track: ‘Disc Wars’

Confession time, I only saw Tron Legacy two nights ago,I’d put off watching the film because although I enjoyed the original as a kid I wasn’t a die-hard fan but I still looked at Legacy like a cash in from Disney to get the late 20′s early 30′s crowds into the cinema. I was wrong to leave it so long, not only is the film great, it looks awesome and has a great script, but also the soundtrack, from Daft Punk is retro-orchestral-electronically-epic. I say this is a special mention as ‘technically’ it’s not a video game soundtrack, but it is a soundtrack for a film based on a fictional computer game, just be grateful I’m not talking about ‘The Last Starfighter’ soundtrack.

Disc Wars starts out like most soundtracks, a rousing orchestra building tension, heavy bass drums hitting down overpowering it all, and then it happens, two minutes in, you are greeted by a rousing synth. A keyboard player is going mental on the keys, there just at that point,  just when you think it has peaked the strings kick back in building to an epic finale.  Daft Punk fans will be amazed at their flexibility and skill, their ability to mold a soundtrack in a way we expect but inject their own awesome electronica into the fold. This is not just a soundtrack you should listen to, this is *the* soundtrack you should listen to.

Welcome to There’s an app for that, the first in a running series that goes some way in proving there is an app for almost each and every human need in the world, highlighting their usefulness (or occasional uselessness) and hopefully improving the quality of life for all.

Do you want to temporarily adjust the brightness of your screen without using the settings? Brightness.

This is the entirety of the app. Really.

Some apps featured on this running series are amazingly useful. Some are unique, a few are interesting and several are ridiculously bizarre. Others are just plain pointless. As the old saying (if about three seconds counts as old) goes, just because there can be an app for everything doesn’t mean there should be.

There is a perfectly useable, accessible and easy to use brightness control in the setting menu. If, however, you have reached nirvana-levels of laziness and want to cut out a menu select screen press, the Brightness app allows iPhone glow control directly from app launch. There are no other setting, no hidden menus. Just a slider that changes the brightness on your iPhone.

Almost in an effort to render the app even more useless than it already was, locking the screen before exiting the app will revert the screen’s brightness to its previous state. “This app changes your screen brightness. That’s it”. At least the developers are being brutally honest with their description. The free version was reviewed for this feature – there is a paid version available for 69p. Presumably an experiment by the creator to truly test the stupidity of man.

Do you want to have a better derrière? Butt Lift Workout

Can you tell the target demographic by the colour scheme?

Fitness games are common sight on the app store, so common in fact that they have a whole category to call their own, providing a vast range of applications for all budding fitness gurus. But what if people are no longer looking at your lovely lady humps? What if your milkshake is no longer bringing the boys to the yard? Forget all those apps dedicated to whole body workouts, you need something solely designed on improving your rear-end.

The free version only allows a ‘beginner’ fitness level but has three intensity settings and eight exercises, with instruction videos for each. A highly American an overly-enthusiastic women will talk you through each workout, pushing you buttocks to their very limits. A decent enough app for what it provides, perfect for those unable to access a gym yet still in search of that killer booty.

Do you need bail? 50 Bail Bonds

Do you live in LA, the San Fernando Valley, Ventura County, Antelope Valley, Santa Clarita or Beverly Hills? Do you like committing crimes? If so today is your lucky day! 50 Bail Bonds is here to get you out of those tricky situations, proving there is (almost) literally an app for everything:

“With our app you will be able to use the panic button if you are arrested, with one touch your information will go to the agent who will begin the process to bail you out.”

With this simple one-touch contact minutes can be shaved off your get-away time, saving you valuable moments to run to your aunt’s crib and shave your legs with Renee’s razor blade.

50 Bail Bonds is useful for those on the other side of the law, providing information on most wanted criminals and people who have skipped bail (for any Dog the Bounty Hunter wannabes out there). Other options are also available, such as being able to anonymously provide tip-off of those skipping bail or being able to browse the contact information of local city and county jails.

It is absolutely mad that anyone who is arrested would turn to their iPhone for help but that is what this series is all about.

Do you want to know the location of the International Space Station? ISS Spotter

The cross-hair pinpoints where the ISS is passing over.

The next time you are on your iPhone, whittling away the evening looking at gifs of funny looking cats pause for a second to appreciate that 370km above you six men are currently residing in space, calling the International Space Station their home.

ISS spotter provides a happy medium between browsing cute animals and actually being in space, allowing you to see the exact position and predicted orbit of the station in real time directly from your phone. If nothing else, it is seriously cool.

The app will also use your location settings to forecast when the ISS will pass overhead, allowing budding astronomers to set alarms and ensure the sighting of the station. In a nice touch, the app is complete free and instead of forcing purchasing or using adds, it simply asks for donations (either 69p or £1.99) from those who enjoyed the service.

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