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Published May 8, 2013

Dog Bin

Tony Stark, a.k.a. another popular super hero, was arrested yesterday after police discovered him unconscious on a friend’s couch.  He was in possession of an unspecified Class A drug, along with a gold/red metallic device that looked like a vibrator, and a handgun.

Superhero group – The Avengers – have already started to tweet of their concerns when working with Mr Stark:

Bruce Banner @The Hulk

I remember being at a party with Tony once.  He told me to gum some white powder he’d stashed away in that suit of his.  And no, I didn’t turn green, but I did suffer a horrific panic attack.

Iron Man

It is believed that Mr Stark’s interest in science began through chemistry, after imbibing powerful pharmaceutical drugs at the age of 2.

‘Tony once told me – in confidence – about how he created the suit,’ said colleague, Thor. ‘He was in a cave in some foreign country somewhere, and found some magic mushrooms.  Next minute… Boom! He’s tripping his balls off and coming up with a crazy idea about a suit.’

Mr Stark was not available to comment.

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